Morgan Murphy
@morgan_murphy
i like: boxing. whiskey. naps. documentaries. also a writer and perfo1
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ummmm...there's an episode of CSI with @bryancallen, @realjeffreyross 2, @RealGilbert & Bobcat Goldthwait, AND IT'S ON NOW. You're welcome.
having a sex tape is the new having a skill.
RT @TheComedyStore: #FF the comics on our 9pm show tonight: @dovdavidoff @morgan_murphy @SandyDanto @bobbyleelive @RickIngraham @OwenSmith4…
If you wait till you get married to have sex & your husband dies the day after the wedding, that's for sure the most awkward one night stand
@BryanFuller Gillian Anderson on Hannibal is my favorite thing. Thank you. Good bye.
RT @AlmightyDolla: @morgan_murphy : What's so fucking funny about that is it's NOT even a joke!!!
Every wife is a trophy wife. It's just that some of them are participation trophies.
Hey girl in your 20's, that guy you're crying about will be so fat in 5 years. Night night.
RT @croninwhocares: @JenKirkman 59 on Conan tonight!
RT @thelaughfactory: 10PM BARE BONES Join @Joesib22 @JakeDillSports @JayLarsoncomedy @EliOlsberg @morgan_murphy @bengleib @BeautifulBodiez …
@aimeemann @MPenn @jonwurster pretty sweet musician joke on Law & Order: SVU https://t.co/IsKSCeFOOd
I'm 5 years old. https://t.co/EfOjwnKGJy
Hey twitter, the send all button in the drafts folder is like having a button that posts all your DM's as tweets. Nobody will ever use it.
still my favorite moment of the NBA playoffs so far. @NBAontNT http://t.co/iCKGUVffEv
Hey guys with shaved chests? No.
RT @TVsJonDore: I'll be at the comedy Attic in Bloomington may 16,17,18. Great club. Check it out.
I root for the bulls like they're my little brother and the heat is their bully at school.
@GregFitzShow thanks for all you do. http://t.co/5ZBxJZhnHZ
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