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Rob Delaney
@robdelaney
Comedian, Writer, 6'3 217 lbs.
Get my new game, War of Words, at ht1
.@juliaroberts how much money do u have
Marijuana? More like MOURNrijuana, because you’re parents will have to go to your funeral if you try it. #no
Check to see if I follow you before you tweet about drugs, weed or pot. I’m #not #interested.
RT @chucknorris: PFL #1 - "I will develop myself to the maximum of my potential in all ways" - Chuck Norris
The first time I see somebody wearing “Google Glass” in public the streets will run with blood.
On the new Queens of the Stone Age album: http://t.co/Pkt6bdeFQz
Kirkland Signature. RT @arnettwill: Paco Rabanne, you? “@robdelaney: @arnettwill What are you wearing?”
RT @jahonkus: @robdelaney Amen I went on family feud one time and that guy whispered to me that my whole family would die but no one heard
If I could go back in time I’d stop Vine from being invented, use “magic” to get laid and tell Hitler to knock it off if I got around to it.
Try to stop watching this • RT @mde_never_dies: https://t.co/VPl8Fp8oaO
Couldn't give a shit. RT @HiMyNameIs_Nick: @robdelaney shout-out for my birthday? Huge fan
I like hairy styles in women’s #trousers. RT @morgiewhite_: @robdelaney do u like harry styles
It blows my mind that people walk around acting like Steve Harvey won't jump out from behind a bush at any moment & murder them.
This goes for me too, guys. RT @AmandaBynes: Believe everything I say on twitter!
... like clockwork http://t.co/Pkt6bdeFQz
RT @gewqk: @robdelaney much appreciated, dude.
Blacks start all trends. RT @TheRoot247: Did Blacks Start the Trend of Heckling Obama? http://t.co/YEnnKpFwKN
RT @Lauren_Italia22: @robdelaney Tweet more like this: https://t.co/7vNQbCQNud
@Ristolable you’re funny!
Trying to hold back from constantly tweeting fitness #tips, my true passion. I know you guys are here for f*rt jokes & #rock talk I get it.
The Bucs! ⚾RT @deniseb19: @robdelaney what NHL team you going for?
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