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Rob Delaney

Rob Delaney Rob Delaney

@robdelaney

Comedian, Writer, 6'3 217 lbs. Get my new game, War of Words, at ht1

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.@MittRomney WHY have u remained silent on Obama’s proposed beef piano legislation?? Pianos should NOT be made of meat. #Coward #tcot

9 months ago
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Saw some great standup tonight from @danielkinno, @mattkirshen & @rove. Like really great.

The Fast & Furious guys keep baby wipes in their glove compartments for when they cum all over their car because they’re so good at driving.

Watch me do standup live via this link in 6-ish minutes: http://t.co/t1wEXuKd0U

I’ll be doing standup live on @YouTube for @ComedyGivesBack at 6pm PST. Watch live here, from anywhere in the world: http://t.co/t1wEXuKd0U

I’ll be doing standup live on @YouTube for @ComedyGivesBack at 6pm. Watch live here, from anywhere in the world: http://t.co/t1wEXuKd0U

Looks like Ray Manzarek finally checked into that big “Hotel California” in the sky…

RT @zeinael1: @robdelaney thought your wife was dead

I’m available to chaperone proms.

RT @Rove 2: Tonight I'm hosting @ComedyGivesBack with @robdelaney and @mattkirshen for @Youtube's #ComedyWeek. Watch it live http://t.co/6z…

If cities are a country’s brain, and national parks are its heart, are malls its malignant poo tumors?

Motion to call really big boobs “thudders.”

I just saw a VERY FUNNY, UNIQUE movie for both #teens & adults. Kings of Summer. Naughty trailer: http://t.co/PoBnqgCmg0

Save the date! Someone is trying to ruin it by having a wedding.

That new Daft Punk is some good pussy eatin’ music.

I joke & gag on here for kicks but really I think I have a great rapport with the youth of today, even “urban” kids. #yolow

#teens aren’t wearing cologne anymore like my generation did. Guess they’d rather play video blog game then have sex or get laid!

For those who want to donate directly to Danielle's recovery, you may do so here: http://t.co/gRRSCfWAsl

Why is nobody talking about this? https://t.co/hYIteGXsLl

NYC • Hang out with me, see my show, do beers, help pay a nice woman’s insane medical bills: http://t.co/p7czQ8ZrY2

Yet here we are. RT @codybiddy: If it wasn't for Twitter, no one would know who @robdelaney is

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Barack Obama
BarackObama  Barack Obama
This account is run by Organ.. TweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwood
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Morgan Murphy
morgan_murphy  Morgan Murphy
i like: boxing. whiskey. nap..
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Andy Richter
AndyRichter  Andy Richter
actor/writer from Midwestern..
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Alyssa Milano
Alyssa_Milano  Alyssa Milano
☮, ♥, and BASEBALL. I tweet .. TweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwoodTweetwood
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