Rob Delaney
@robdelaney
Comedian, Writer, 6'3 217 lbs.
Get my new game, War of Words, at ht1
RT @kateodotorg: Illustrations of @robdelaney's many tweets wherein he makes fun of @mittromney. Genius. Please click and be amused. http://t.co/itGcphgk
People angry about my last tweet: IT’S A JOKE. I never found it.
Finally found my wife’s clitoris! It’s in her coffin with the rest of her.
RT @leyawn: i hope every one is trying their best online today but also having fun
saggy + natural + hairy + discipline
Edinburgh • Come to my shoe. Tkts: https://t.co/pwru2L9txn
This is hilarious. RT @TeaPartyCat: http://t.co/j2L5drxXF7
.@brides my wife is a mess
I just discovered Jenna Marbles. I think she’s cool. Like a gateway drug for girls to think about bigger ideas. 👍
RT @FourEyedQueef: get out of a ticket by telling the officer you were busy breastfeeding yourself
RT @IamEnidColeslaw: FACT: @robdelaney's new board game is amazing. BUY IT. http://t.co/7dO4QT151J
I MIGHT cry this is so beautiful. RT @Beccanthropy: Rob Delaney-themed Scrabble game. http://t.co/BNOOctfBwe
I’m 55 hrs or so off coffee. (Insane amounts of it too, all day, every day.) Shockingly no headaches. I feel sad & tired & mumbly.
These 2 clowns are constantly posting quips & gags on their Twiter homepages: @juliadavidovich & @senderblock23. #humour
Have a #moist weekend.
Just saw an old woman trip over a dog’s leash and fall into the path of a bus. #EpicFail!
RT @Paul_Bowen: @robdelaney This is the funniest thing I ever read, and it made my whole family laugh together, thank you.
#NewYorkCity - Come to my shows which are very soon: http://t.co/Hk0f1pwu8s 💠
your fat
“I’m a joker. I’m a smoker. I’m a midnight toker. I’ve gone blind. My organs are shutting down.” - if Steve Miller told the truth about #pot
I like how Obama acts like he’s “tough on terrorism” but ignores the most dangerous terrorist of all: the marijuana cigarette. #420NOBAMA
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